Saturday, May 21, 2011

I really was pregnant after all.

This became apparent when and 8 pound 10 ounce ball of heaven exited my body at 4:59 am yesterday morning.

I imagine selecting a box from a grocery shelf labeled "Pregnancy, 40 weeks of woe with a prize inside," and the particular box I selected had a flashy banner across the top reading "BONUS! This box includes nine additional days!" Let that serve as a warning to you; always read labels.
Here is my prize


Thursday, May 19, 2011

As it turns out...

I am not actually pregnant. I am just a gimpy woman with an unconventional figure.
The part about being 6cm dilated and 95% effaced I can't quite explain but at this point I'm quite sure it's hokum.

Tuesday, May 17, 2011

I am forty-one weeks pregnant.
At lunch time today it took an hour to boil macaroni.
An hour.
On a brand new stove.
Cranked up to "high"
I have something to say about this.
Here it is

WHAT THE HELL?

Friday, May 13, 2011

Waiting

Tuesday we were in the waiting area at the bank. "Highlights" magazine, it turns out is less than entertaining for the 2-4 year old set. One of the bank associates, a tall stately woman with a perfect pedicure and black patent stilletos, came over to chat. She reported that she loves children and having none of her own, spends her motherly energy in doting on a pair of nieces.

She asked my due date and when I answered "tomorrow" a look of sheer terror came over her lovely face. "Are you feeling anything?" she questioned. The channel cocktail ring on her hand stood out from her finger as she tensed with worry. "No, not at the moment," I told her. If that relaxed her at all the reprieve of her stress was not long lived. Only a breath passed before the follow up question, "But you have?" "Oh, sure" I told her, "things have been going on for weeks now." I didn't dare say the word out loud "contractions" I thought it might push her over the edge.

"Don't worry," I said "I'm not going to up and have the baby here in the bank." "Oh, please don't" she responded, her tension finally giving way.

We chatted for a few more minutes until it was time for us to leave. As we were going she asked, "What will you do if the baby doesn't come tomorrow? Go the the hospital and they'll get the baby out?" "No, no," I said. "He'll come"

Friday's here now and the full moon of my belly still, somehow waxing. As I, (we) wait for the shift that will see it through from full to waining gibbous, I continue to reassure, "He'll come."

Tuesday, May 10, 2011

On Mother's Day

I got to help with flowers for the festivities at church. It was quite enjoyable.









And here are my own flowers, also my boy who can't help but jump in the frame when a photo is taken.

Sometimes he ends up taking over the whole thing,


and sometimes I crop him out. Real sneaky like.




As long as there are kids in this post I might as well include them all.





Happy Mothers Day